"But why dost thou judge thy brother? Or why dost thou set at nought thy brother? For we shall all stand before the judgment seat of Christ." -Romans 14:10

There are things in life that I can honestly answer with, "I don't know." Because I don't. My "spirituality" for example; I don't know what to believe, or what's real and what is not. It kind of scares me.

Tonight, like most Wednesday nights, I attended Youth Group at a church my family has been attending ever since I was young. I've always sort of questioned the whole thing, and more so as I've become older. I just don't know. It's a complex thing. But, I figure that if I'm not exposed to multiple things like church and that type of thing, I can't really make a decision because I don't know what that's all about. Now that I'm a Senior, and getting ready to move forward in my life, I think I may have finally made a decision about what I think on this topic. So what happened tonight, right?

A droog and I had decided that rather than going to New York with the group, we would rather attending homecoming. We told our leaders our decision and were instantly shot with things that, really, I don't think is the "Christian" way to approach it. It's tough to believe in these things and trust these people when they have formed a paradox. The paradox being that they claim to be holy people, and free of judgment because only God can judge you, when I feel some of these people are the most judging people I've ever met. My droog and I were judged, and one of these people who are supposed to "guide" us and help us, flat out prayed to God asking him to help us make the “right" decision between the trip, and homecoming and that if we chose the trip to bring peace to us, but if not, that we would not have peace. That doesn't seem very "Christian" to me.

It's going to be very hard to return back there after being told that, and makes it even harder for me to trust and believe in this stuff.

Northland College Update!

It's official, I was accepted!

I got a letter last week from the college congratulating me on my acceptance. I also received a $6,000 scholarship for my academic excellence in the Social Sciences area. I'm really excited. My mom already went out and bought be some "college wear."

Now that I know where I'm going, I'm not as sad about graduating. I was for awhile, but I'm quite excited now. Then there's the money aspect of college...I tend to forget about that burden.

$6,000 down, $18,000 more to go. I'm planning on applying for two scholarships from the school itself, FAFSA, local scholarships, and possibly a student loan or two (I'm trying to avoid that as much as possible). I'll also get a job, and am hoping to do a work study that the campus offers.

My decided major was Broad Field Social Studies Education, and I'm pretty content with the decision. It may change once I get into college, but I know that I for sure want to do something in the Social Science field. It's what I love, and I might as well do what I love because I'm going to be doing it forever.

Life's just moving along. It really does fly by.